...... Rewind......

That was it ?
I didn't like that much -
Can we do it again please ?

How many times a day does that happen ?
Do you ever feel like that -
I feel like that right now .
I woke up this morning and went :
' o.k. God ..... That was the weekend .. Hmm....
Could you hit rewind for me so I can redo all of that.'

The answer I got surprised me.
I felt god saying that things could of turned out differently . Things could have been so so so different had I made wise decisions and responded in a mature way to the situations that were so difficult .
By a simple choice I could have so affected those situations- there is an alternate plot line to this recent weekend . I blew it right out the door .

Now I don't think anyone likes knowing that they have failed.
It is particularly hard for me to face because I can never believe in myself for little things , nothing I do on a day- to -day basis is enough and I never feel worthy of anything.

The thing about life is that it happens only once and that it comes and goes soooo quickly.
One thing I need to learn to do is to take some time out before each day and to think about what I want to get out of it . Some times in a difficult situation it is better to stop and breathe before reacting. This is something I struggle with all the time .
When it comes to challenge and difficulty , I seem to be doing anything to stay above water and get through.
I am waving my arms around and behaving like a maniac and God is saying:

˜ what on earth are you doing there?- just swim , don't try and fight it - it will be so much easier if you learn to swim and go along with what I am trying to do here, than doing whatever you are doing there because as much as you try to get somewhere - this is where I am trying to take you, and what you are trying to do here and now is going to take you in the other direction .
so just agree and work with me - don't resist because it would just make my job that much easier.


I need to get rid of the regret and move on- all of the things that happened and were said are done and can't be changed - we can only work with today and the decisions and attitudes that I am choosing to have today are going to have a HUGE affect on the tomorrow in my life.

So carpe Dium - SEIZE THE DAY !

' And we know that god causes everything to work together for those who love god and are called according to his purpose for them
Romans 8:28

'I don't mean to say that I have already achieved these things or have already reached perfection .But I have press on to pocess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No brothers and sisters , I have not yet achieved , but I focus on this one thing : Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead . I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prise for which god, through Jesus Christ is calling us.
Let all who are spiritually mature hold onto theses things . If you disagree on some point , I believe god will make it plain to you but we must hold on to the progress we have already made
Philippians 3 :12-16